What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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