Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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