I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize
