from now on my penis is your penis
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
