so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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