Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
