nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Please, let me fuck your mom
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
