What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
