Tell her she can't have a vagina
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
