I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
i dont even know how to be here
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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