I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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