i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
