Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
