yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
You made out with two different species that night
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I think I just shit out all my problems.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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