The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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