sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize