babies were throwing up all over the place
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
