using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
