you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
