Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
