the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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