HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
this will be a night to untag.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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