she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
the raccoons are back...
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