i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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