So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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