Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
