I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i permit you to call me
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
