do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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