This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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