It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
