there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
