As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
