So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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