I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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