Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
