you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
