rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
