girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I want her autograph on my taint
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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