party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
