plz talk dirty to me
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize
