Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
