The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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