we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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