They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize
