NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
The air was thick with penises
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
