Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
id be glad to
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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