oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
