Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
