can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
