Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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